Your partner bought himself a brand-new sports car, dyed his hair blonde, and even bought a gym membership. Smells like male midlife crisis symptoms, no?
My dad came home once with a brand-new car. Okay, it was a station wagon, but that was simply because he didn’t have the money to buy a sports car. He did get shiny rims on it though, so, apparently, that hit the spot for him. But the point is, he was exhibiting classic male midlife crisis symptoms.
He just turned 50. My brother and I had almost finished our education, and now what? This is where the midlife crisis kicked in. But in reality, this phase is just really an intense moment of self-reflection. [Read: 18 ways to help someone feel awesome again]
The 13 male midlife crisis symptoms to understand
My dad spent every day working, taking us to school or soccer practice. He had no time to self-reflect on his life. But now, he had time. So, to cope with the self-realization that he’s aging, he bought a car.
Though this isn’t what all men do. Some men date women half their age, others quit their jobs and travel, and some zone out in front of the TV watching football. But how do you know your man is going through a midlife crisis if everyone processes this phase differently? Well, there are some male midlife crisis symptoms to look out for. Know the signs.
#1 They want change, and they want it fast. Like my dad, some men are looking for a change. They’ll buy a motorcycle or car, maybe install a swimming pool in their backyard. They just want to go back to feeling young again. The things that they regret not doing in their past, well, they’re making up for it now. Skydiving may be extreme for you, but for them, it’s a chance to feel adventure and thrill. [Read: 31 simple pleasures and moments of bliss most of us overlook]
#2 What was important doesn’t matter anymore. Perhaps they used to love reading or going on fishing trips, but now, they don’t care about those activities. You may even notice them question their beliefs and values, changing their opinions on topics which they were firm believers in. [Read: 14 secrets of self-worth and self-belief]
#3 They’re depressed. Depression can pop up any time in a person’s life and sometimes when you least expect it. Some men will experience depression when going through a midlife crisis.
You’ll notice their mood change, they feel sadness and become more pessimistic. In addition, they stop doing activities which they once liked, have weight gain or loss, and will lack the energy to do things.
#4 He’s angry. If you are arguing with him, you’ll notice that he’s angry at everything. He may try to blame his past on you, saying that you’re the cause for his unhappiness. If your partner is unhappy, they’re not going to self-reflect on the choices they made. Instead, they’re going to point the finger at you. It’s always easier to point the finger at someone else when you’re unhappy with your life.
#5 He using abusive substances. Now, everyone likes to have a couple beers or a glass of wine every now and then. However, you’ve noticed that your partner is drinking more often than usual. This sign doesn’t necessarily mean he’s experiencing a midlife crisis, but he is going through some personal issues. [Read: 22 secret rules of life to ensure you’ll never be unhappy again]
#6 He keeps going down memory lane. Right now, he’s all about the past. Most of his sentences start with, “what if” and they quickly analyze their past, wondering if they made any good decisions. Everyone has nostalgic moments, but, in reality, no one has any idea how their life would look if they did something different. Going down memory lane is fine up until a point where they start to act on it.
#7 He doesn’t spend time with you. He may be pushing himself away, trying to fulfill the fantasy that’s on his mind right now. You may be having less sex than normal because he’s experiencing a midlife crisis.
He’s unhappy, he’s depressed, thus, your sex life is going to take a toll. Though, if you’re having more sex, you want to make sure he’s staying loyal to you. Many men use this tactic to cover up affairs. [Read: Is he cheating? 21 unintentional behaviors he just can’t hide]
#8 He wants to change his career. This usually isn’t something people just decide on overnight. When you’re going to quit your job, you take a lot of time to think about it and try to find a replacement job in the process. However, for him, he simply woke up one morning and decided that he doesn’t want to work and wants to sail to Europe instead.
#9 He has a complete makeover. This is one of those classic male midlife crisis symptoms that’s easy to see. He didn’t just buy new shoes. He’s now getting himself a new wardrobe, going to the gym, shaving his beard off. Now, this could be a sign that he’s trying to boost his ego. In this case, you need to help mend it by complimenting him. However, it could also mean he’s having an affair as well.
#10 He wants to or has had an affair. You may have caught him having a wandering eye or seen some suspicious texts on his phone. Well, your partner may be cheating on you. Affairs commonly happen during midlife crises, of course, for different reasons. This is where communication and empathy towards your partner are essential. [Read: Why do men cheat? The 3 biggest reasons and 27 excuses they use]
#11 He thinks his life is boring. And he’s openly told you that he thinks it’s boring. At one point, he was happy with his life and the way it turned out but now, he’s bored. Most likely he’s noticed that he hasn’t completed many of his dreams and now feels unfulfilled. Him expressing his boredom shows that he’s in need of spicing up his routine.
#12 He lets himself go. You have some men that will do a complete makeover with themselves, while others will simply give up. They stop dressing nicely, gain weight, and lack of their basic hygiene skills. This is also a sign of depression. This weight gain will usually happen suddenly, so you will notice the change quickly. [Read: What men would love to hear more often]
#13 Don’t ignore these signs. These signs are not to be ignored. It’s common for spouses to ignore these signs and wait for them to pass. However, that’s the wrong thing to do. Instead, communicate with your partner and express your support for him. You want to encourage him to make positive changes in his life but feel that he’s not doing it alone.
[Read: How to make your man happy in 20 little ways]
Now that you know the male midlife crisis symptoms, you won’t have to second guess yourself. Instead, you’ll be able to support your partner and help them pass through this phase.
The post Male Midlife Crisis Symptoms: 13 Things Men are Most Likely to Do is the original content of LovePanky – Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.